I love my Dad, I really do. I am so grateful he took me on as his when I was 3. I appreciate that he was always the buffer between my mother and I. He's the reason why I am so offbeat.We are not as close as we used to be due to some events but I appreciate that he has always been there for me. I love him.

HOWEVER:

  • The watching BET to better understand Blackness and relate with your Black daughter(but not the Black son because he' mixed with white.)
  • The using Tyler Perry as a tool to learn about Black women.
  • The incorrect usage of AAVE and continuing to use it while I am around when I have said repeatedly not to use it.
  • The fedora hat wearing
  • The putting his damn hands in my hair.
  • The "I just don't think those people are the best to be around" type answers when asking where I am going and who I am with.
  • The ask Afro about everything under the sun about Black culture.
  • The wanting to go back to the good ole days(:/)
  • The "what up homie" "Hows it doing home girl" "whats happening home skillet"
  • The jokes about President Obama (I'm your facebook friend Dad I see everything) and the ironic nature that he has a mixed race son and wouldn't dare let anyone talk about him the same way.
  • The constant putting down of my mother and step mother before this current one that borders on misgynoir.
  • The letting anti-Blackness slide and telling me to just forget about when it comes to step-mother/sisters
  • and other shit

is getting to me.

At what point do you go "Dad I love you but your whiteness and subsequent ignorance because of it, is getting in the way of our relationship"?

What do you do when your white Dad's annoying behavior is at an all time high, the fridge is empty, you have no money (30 cents just doesn't go as far as it used to), and you're hungry?

You suck it up and choose to attend family dinner without saying anything because his chicken fajitas are the bomb.

At least he hasn't taken me to a park full of murderous dinosaurs....yet.

Chicken Fajitas